So many people are chasing love and gain a sense of identity by who loves them or who they love. You see this with mothers, children, lovers, wives, husbands, and even those who follow a guru (see 'Free Breath', 11/14/2014). So many people feel incomplete when they don't have that significant other in their life, but this often just masks how uncomfortable an individual can feel as-is, on its own, without a label or an identity that it can fix itself to or latch onto.
Latching in love is so common because it provides a sense of direction, too: two merged in one, a break-down in boundaries, an intimacy so deep that makes you want to shackle to The Other, 'to lock in your love', to latch - as that eponymous song so glorifies. The two then move along in a tightly-knitted groove or trajectory in Life until the relationship runs the risk of becoming unequal, out of balance, dysfunctional. The 'Devil' card in the Rider-Waite tarot deck shows this latching in love so clearly with the two lovers now literally tethered together, chains around their necks.
One person inevitably wants to scream for liberation - I've seen this with children of (s)mothers, lovers, spouses - while the other becomes a love-chaser, over-identifying with its object of love. Its whole identification centering on The Other. The Other becomes unwittingly the fulcrum for how the love-chaser's day goes, where it goes, what it does, how it runs its life, how it feels, literally whether it's happy or sad. The relationship can become like a prison, built with scared minds, minds telling you you need direction in the first place, minds uncomfortable with an uncertain direction or identity. Love won't fix any of this forever and part of this yoga and breath work is training ourselves not to listen to the many insecure, scared voices inside. Love without expectation is liberation. You can look in the mirror and see Everything. Right there.
Latching in love is so common because it provides a sense of direction, too: two merged in one, a break-down in boundaries, an intimacy so deep that makes you want to shackle to The Other, 'to lock in your love', to latch - as that eponymous song so glorifies. The two then move along in a tightly-knitted groove or trajectory in Life until the relationship runs the risk of becoming unequal, out of balance, dysfunctional. The 'Devil' card in the Rider-Waite tarot deck shows this latching in love so clearly with the two lovers now literally tethered together, chains around their necks.
One person inevitably wants to scream for liberation - I've seen this with children of (s)mothers, lovers, spouses - while the other becomes a love-chaser, over-identifying with its object of love. Its whole identification centering on The Other. The Other becomes unwittingly the fulcrum for how the love-chaser's day goes, where it goes, what it does, how it runs its life, how it feels, literally whether it's happy or sad. The relationship can become like a prison, built with scared minds, minds telling you you need direction in the first place, minds uncomfortable with an uncertain direction or identity. Love won't fix any of this forever and part of this yoga and breath work is training ourselves not to listen to the many insecure, scared voices inside. Love without expectation is liberation. You can look in the mirror and see Everything. Right there.
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